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The Stories we tell Ourselves

By February 11, 2020June 22nd, 2021No Comments

Sarah Linton

Professional & Personal Coach

Stories we tell ourselves. Are your stories your  Fairytale or your Nightmare?

 

Listening to and learning Stories, Reading and Storytelling is an inherent part of our childhood.

To begin with, our imagination, creative thinking, creative writing, all hold powerful sway over memories, behaviours, and identities.

As children, we create our own version of our stories.

I recall years of creative play with our treasure chest of dress-up for our boys & with my own siblings. Namely, the superheroes, the princesses, the villains amidst the afternoons of creating memories with laughter and tears, that invariably finished with cake, ice cream, and storytime.

Photo Credit:  hiddencatch | Stories and creative imagination

Stories and Storytelling

Stories and Storytelling are acts of communication. At the time of Mum’s passing – her final few words were ‘keep the story going.”

Stories get passed down through generations and her magical stories had been part of our DNA.

Storytelling is an intrinsic part that makes us human– our unique ability for creativity & imagination sets us apart from the rest of the animal kingdom.
The art of storytelling carries on for a lifetime unless we intervene.

Our experiences become our story. We all have a unique version of events and no 2 humans are the same.

Have you ever been in a conversation where you have shared the same event as those with you and hear a recount of a situation that is not the same as yours?
Yep! Me too!  That’s because you will see things through your own unique lens based on the narrative you have created for your life story.

Photo Credit: pfluegler photo | is yours your Fairytale or your Nightmare?
Photo Credit: Allen Penton  | Heh…. let me tell you a story about you…

However much we want to create magical experiences, not all our stories have happy endings.  So often the stories we tell ourselves are truly destructive.

Before we know it, we create stories from our childhoods and over the years, this becomes our narrative.

Have you ever caught yourself thinking any of these?

Starting with “I AM….

      • Too ‘X’ for that
      • Not good enough?
      • Unable to do ‘X’ because I’m not that sort of person.
      • Can only do ‘Y’ because ‘X’ happened to me.
      • Less than creative
      • Way too fat or too thin
      • Not going to fit in here and I am not loveable”

In brief, parts of our stories get erased & we are left with the remnants that become ingrained beliefs about ourselves. Furthermore, as humans, we are meaning-making machines whose thoughts can provide us with a warped perspective of reality.

We create narratives to move us into – and through – the moments in our life.

We connect dots that happen to us, subconsciously delete the dots that don’t serve our narrative, and we can also distort the dots to fit a story that serves us well.

Then, we keep recreating the story over and over and over again.

We have an incredible in-built editor that continually creates and updates.

Take a bow Editor-in-charge: Our Brains!

  • Firstly, our THOUGHTS that become our BELIEFS.
  • Secondly,  our BELIEFS influence our BEHAVIOURS.
  • And guess what?… Our BEHAVIOURS drive our ACTIONS & REALITY.

When you think about a story you are telling yourself right now.

    • What are you telling yourself about your current circumstances?
    • Have you consciously or subconsciously created it?
    • Was this story passed on by a friend, a parent, a sibling or some part of society?
Photo Credit: TBC   | Stuck in your nightmare?

Have any parts of your stories become part of your nightmare?

We share 5 hacks to help you DISCOVER and connect to a future path amidst any overgrown forest.
And you won’t need a superhero to rescue you!

 

1) Life Is A Process. Trust That Process.

Spoiler alert! Life does not come with a neat beginning, middle and ending.
There are days when the surf is up & we have to face that BS that can bring us down. Believe those tough days will come to contrast with the bright days and there will be lessons to learn. They may not appear immediately – trust that they will appear in time.

 

2) Find Your Fantastic 4: your tribe.

Jim Rohn nailed it when he said ” you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”.  Be it 5 or 4 …choose wisely!

Invest time with your Fantastic 4 or Fab 5. Thinking in Marvel terms, find Your Mister Fantastic, Your Invisible Woman, Your Human Torch & Your Thing.
They will excite, encourage and inspire you – as you will them.

Life is too short not to be with those that support, encourage, listen & know you.
Be mindful when you are choosing your 4.  You will stretch, nurture & nourish each other and grow in strength together. You will share the raw and real and always have each others’ back.

 

3) Have the courage to Sew New Seeds

We grow through what we go through. Sewing new seeds open possibility and opportunity. Be courageous in trying new approaches to embrace different perspectives. Give them time to grow roots and notice how updates are impacting your narrative.

 

4) Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy.

If you are comparing yourself to others, you are depleting your own happiness.
You are depriving yourself of all the great things you have & it is stealing your joy. When we compare ourselves to others we end up focusing our energy on bringing others down instead of raising ourselves up. There is one thing that you’re better at than other people: being you – forget the rest & be your best.

 

5) Rewrite Your Happy Ending.

Do you know any author who has not had the power to change the ending of their novel? You are your own author and have the power to slay the villain, You can choose who and what you take with you into any new chapter. It’s a decision and you only need to turn the page.

Just like any software. You can update your narrative.

If you want to uplevel and make an impact on your future,
we can help you get to where you want to be.

 

Book your 60 minute Complimentary Consult HERE

“We can stop defining ourselves in terms of our stories. There comes a time when we have to accept our past as precisely what it is – tha past. It cannot be changed. When we change the story & the meaning we tell ourselves about it, we can change our future.”

Takeaways

  • Update your software!
  • Your past will influence your future decisions, yet your past does not determine your future.
  • Be the author of your own story.
  • Find your Fab 4
  • Stay open to possibilities & opportunities.

 

What stories are you telling yourself about yourself and your past that are ready for a software update?

We love to hear from our community, let us know what’s story you want to update.

 

If you want to uplevel and make an impact on your future,  I would love to be a catalyst for you to step into a future version of yourself.

There is only everything to gain.

Book your 60-minute Complimentary Consult HERE

Connect with us so you can
Discover, Nourish & Thrive.

 

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Sarah Linton

Sarah Linton

Sarah Linton is a Catalyst for change and impact specialising in making change a reality for personal and professional evolution. A former business leader at global organisations including the Walt Disney Company. A Director, Master Coach, Mum and Founder of Tides of Change & The WAVE.co.nz Sarah is passionately connected to her True North as a prolific creator of new horizons & holding that as a vision for her clients partnering across time zones in the UK, USA & Asia Pacific.

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